New Yorkers: an Impression

So one thing I've heard a lot of over the years is that New Yorkers aren't very friendly.

I beg to differ.  Or at least, put some rather large qualifiers on the statement.

The day after I arrived I was doing my usual city orientation rituals, the primary one being the get-a-transit-pass one.  I'm standing in line at the manned ticket booth and the fellow behind me strikes up a conversation.  He's from New York, just got back in town (hence the reason he was in line) and we had a brief discussion about traffic, tourists, and lines before he left.  The next day, the fellow at St. John the Divine had several good recommendations for where to go for lunch, and the guy at the Y did too.  These were just the first of several moments that stuck in my head.

Something that kind of made me sit up and notice was the street people and beggars.  All big cities have them.  That's not surprising to me.  And I don't know if it's a case of "familiarity breeds contempt" for me back in Vancouver, though I sincerely hope not.  However it falls, it seemed to me that the New York street folks were more willing to come right up and ask than anywhere else I'd been (again, I don't know if this was just a change of scenery making me more aware or if that is the case), and after the first couple of days I'd decided that I was going to have a certain amount of money every day that was set aside for giving to some of them.  Partly because I thought it was a good mindset for me to get into or to practise getting into, and partly because some of the people I saw and the things they said made my heart hurt.  

One of the ones that stuck most in my head was early on in the UN week.  It was rather cold at this point.  There was a blizzard that was supposed to hit sometime that night, and it was consistently below freezing after dark at that point of the trip.  

I was walking to the venue for the next panel when a fellow came up to me to ask for money to get a hot meal that night.  He spoke fairly quickly, probably trying to gt as much in as possible before I'd lose interest, and basically was him telling me he was going to head for a shelter that night but they didn't serve hot food, and he'd been outside the night before and wanted something warm to eat that night.  
I thought that "makes sense to me," and I gave him $5.
His whole face lit up.  You could practically see something in his eyes lift, and he said "I can buy a soup!" in a tone of voice I'd be hard put to describe.

And I honestly hadn't been expecting that.  I mean, I also don't know what, if anything I was (might have been?) expecting but I also remember the very distinct feeling of surprise at his reaction and the almost shocked pleasure that he was so happy (excited? Surprised? Something).  It was good for me, and I'm probably still parsing out why.

Another one was in the second week there.  
I was walking over to the Northern tip of the High Line from 45th and 7th, exploring New York on foot (like you do), and I was passing a rather large construction site with all the usual detours and dodges.  Right as I was going by a guy opened up one of the fences and came out onto the sidewalk with a smile and said "Hello!  It's a pretty good Monday, isn't it?"  I had just come from a matinee show of Come From Away (which is flippin' brilliant.  If you're in new York anytime soon you should see it), it was sunny, and I was having a very nice walk, so I smiled back and said "It is a very good Monday!"  Next thing I know he's stopped walking, gives me an even bigger smile and said "That was so happy.  You've inspired me!"
Again, I wasn't sure how to respond, or what to make of it other than I thought it was very nice, so I said thanks and we waved at each other and continued on with our days.

It was something of a theme throughout the trip, really.  I had another compliment on my smile a couple nights later, and the Saturday night I managed to hit the Metropolitan museum of art for their late opening and music at the bar (which was also brilliant.  Go check out ETHEL string quartet on youtube) it was crowded enough that they asked if I'd mind sharing a table.  When I said no I ended up having a very enjoyable conversation with a local woman about what I'd been doing, what I should see next, the best place to get Broadway tickets, and why Vancouver would be a good destination for a vacation.  Walking through Central Park a fellow stopped me to ask what I thought about a couple of new buildings and if they ruined the view.  When I said I was a tourist I got a run down of some of the local goings on and a comparison of tourist behaviours.  And how could I forget the truly entertaining shouted conversation with an older man leaning out his window in Little Italy about the effectiveness of hot water dumped out the window to melt sidewalk ice.  In fact, I had more random conversations with people in New York than I think I've had anywhere else.

That's not to say that the stereotype is unfounded.  I had several interactions with people that would fit right in, though funnily enough (from my perspective) it was always with people who's job required they interact with me, and likely dozens of other people too.  And they weren't necessarily rude, just surly.  
It was actually rather interesting to compare notes with some of the other ladies on my trip.  It seemed to tally with what I'd seen, though I think my favourite story was when one of the girls asked a security guard to take her picture with something and she said the guard sighed and grumped a yes, but then got really into taking the picture and was trying to find the perfect angle.  This basically sums up my experience of New Yorkers nicely.  

If they're paid to deal with the general public, they're twice as likely to be a bit sour.  If, however, you're asking for directions or are open to random conversations in the middle of the sidewalk, they are an extremely cheerful and friendly bunch of people.  

It was something I appreciated a lot and I find I rather miss it.